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Saturday, May 07, 2005

Re-crap

Having confused some of my newer readership with recent posts, I feel a recap of "Witho's so-called career" may be in order. And things being "in order" require an ordered list, so here goes:

  1. June 1995: Witho graduates from the University of London with a First Class degree in "French with Applied Computing" (don't laugh) and no real idea of what she's going to do other than "work in Francophone country" as necessitated by French boyfriend whose command of English is, at best, non-existent. Okay, he could say "flip-flops" quite well, but only because he was amused by it and used it in preference to the French word ("les tongs" apparently, though I always imagined it to be "thongs"...).

  2. Jan 1996: Witho commences contract position as "Technical Assistant" (i.e. vastly overpaid bilingual secretary) at Eurocontrol, Brussels (Belgium: both Francophone and a country - sort of - so mission accomplished on that score). The plan is that French boyfriend will return from military service in New Caledonia, live with Witho and find work in Brussels.

  3. June 1996: Previous plan turned out to be bollocks as it assumed that French boyfriend *wasn't* an emotional cripple... (a débacle which probably merits not just one but a whole series of dedicated posts...)

  4. Dec 1996: Witho ceases contract position at Eurocontrol with plan to return to blightly and become an Air Traffic Controller.

  5. 1997: Previous plan turned out to be bollocks as it assumed that Witho would succeed at the second interview. Witho works as secretary for Pipework engineering company whilst applying for endless "proper" jobs.

  6. Jan 1998: Witho applies again to be Air Traffic Controller whilst at the same time applying for generic "Graduate Programmes" with a variety of corporations and public sector organisations. Some interviews ensue, but no job offers are forthcoming.

  7. April 1998: Witho is offered position on IT Graduate Trainee Programme with [insert company name] at the same time as being invited for second interview for Air Traffic Control programme.

  8. April 1998: Witho accepts position at [insert company name] in Southampton

  9. October 1998 - February 2004: Witho becomes experienced IT Developer on the IBM AS400 platform. After about 5 years, Witho loses enthusiasm and starts thinking about career change. In the meantime, she meets the BF who lives in London. Realising that she's too old to have a long distance relationship, she resigns with a view to moving to London, but is persuaded to continue to work for [insert company name] from their London office. Loses will to live commuting to work on "The Sidcup Line" and resigns again with no idea of what to do next, other than "something worthwhile"

  10. April - July 2004: Witho works as temporary secretary for Recruitment Consultants (i.e. about as far from being "worthwhile" as you can get). BF has, in the meantime, secured new job in Taunton, Somerset.

  11. August 2004: Move to Somerset, have car crash

  12. September 2004: Witho works as audio typist for investment company for one week (I wasn't that bad, it was a temp position!)

  13. September 2004 - January 2005: Witho works as temporary secretary at NHS Primary Care Trust and is astounded at the inefficiency and bureaucracy

  14. January 2005: After a number of fruitless applications for jobs in the not-for-profit sector, she finally applies for (and secures) another AS400 position, claiming that it's only until she works out what she really wants to do. The rest of the world remains unconvinced...

Not a shining example of decisiveness, is it?



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